Our motives are what generally spark us to set out to make new friends. Maybe you're a bit of a loser and everyone misunderstands you, or maybe you're just mean and nobody wants to be near you. Either way, the motive inside your head is the need for friends, so everywhere you go you have to keep an eye out for that potential best bud that could satisfy that need. I would use this as an example of the push leading to the pull. You need friends is the push, so you keep an eye out for someone worth pulling on..or for someone to pull on you who knows. However, this isn't the only thing that might lead you to seek some pals. The pull can also lead to the push. Say you have plenty of friends, you're just the coolest kid in town everyone loves you blah blah screw you. Then one day you see someone and you're just like wow, I want to be friends with that person! Now it's the complete opposite as before. Something about that person whether it be their looks (you shallow little..) or their posture, or even their smell, whatever it was made you want to befriend them. In this instance the incentive (that person) instilled this new motive into you (desire to befriend) and made you act out of character and try to add one more person to your laundry list of cronies. However, you can't satisfy this emotion until you actually muster up the courage to approach said amazing person and lay down the groundwork for friendship. This consumatory behavior will then complete the motivation sequence and you can go do your little clown dance cause you made a new friend. Congrats buddy, you're the coolest.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Hey, what's your name?
Everyone has felt the need to belong. We strive to fit in with our family members, friends, peers, whoever. What do we do though to satisfy this desire for acceptance? One common occurrence would be the act of going out and making friends. I'd like to apply the push and pull theory to the act of friend making.