Wednesday, July 26, 2017



Per the slide jealousy is:  A negative emotion triggered by possible loss of one’s mate. 

  • Men report greater distress from sexual infidelity than do women
  • Women report greater distress from emotional infidelity then men
My take:  I don’t believe in men “distress” more from sexual infidelity more than woman.  I believe both men and women get jealous the same no matter if its “sexual” or “emotional”.  Jealousy arises when there is an issue in the relationship that needs to be addressed.  I know that jealousy makes me feel angry and I need to pinpoint why I’m jealous.  If jealousy isn’t addressed in a relationship then the relationship is due to fail.

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  1. I can only go off personal experience. I do feel like guys are definitely more distressed over sexual infidelity than emotional. This is because (from personal experience) it's like you letting another lion play in their territory. Think it attacks their pride more than anything else. As a woman, I would much prefer you to sexually cheat on me than catch feelings for someone you are talking to. That burns me up inside like how could you let her in to the heart that belongs to me. Makes me feel less than, as if I didn't have enough to secure your heart. Well, in my past life, thats how I felt.

  2. I just went through a divorce over infidelity. I was deployed while my wife had an affair. It was obvious someone was taking her attention and just the overall feel was off. As a female myself, I tried to prepare myself just in case if she really way cheating. I knew that I could forgive move on, and continue my marriage if it were just a temporary moment of sexual connections so of course it hurt, but I wasn't going to leave her because of it. When she admitted it, and said that it was a deeper connection than just a sexual one, our marriage just wasn't salvageable anymore, no matter what we did to make it happen.
    So with my experience the statement that is present on the slide is correct.

  3. Wow- these are deep and honest stories, especially yours Dyshay. Yes, the heart is crazy and it wants what it wants. You are very brave to talk about this.

  4. Being a guy, I really feel that it doesn't matter if it's sexual or emotional either way I'm going to be quite upset. I know my girlfriend would feel that emotional infidelity would be horribly painful while physical infidelity would cause her to enter a fit of rage. There is a major difference between physical and emotional infidelity, as you all have pointed out. That difference is that emotional infidelity means that someone outside of your relationship has started to find their own spot within your heart, while physical infidelity can mean that there is not a place in your heart being taken, just a physical connection. Personally, I am a jealous or territorial person, mainly because I feel like someone could have the ability to come in and treat my girlfriend better for a short period of time, we've been together for nearly 4 years and people have tried and failed, but I feel that there could always be a threat.

  5. There is certainly plenty of anecdotal evidence to go around confirming one theory or another regarding jealousy. The thing about sexual vs emotional infidelity is that gender differences in the magnitude of which one effects which gender more have been confirmed across a variety of cultures indicating something deeper than social preference. This all stems from an evolutionary psychology framework where men are at an increased risk of cuckoldry (due to sexual infidelity) while women run the risk of losing resources for their children to another woman (due to emotional infidelity) hence why the two genders differ in which one they consider worse. Entire books could be written on the subject, and they have been. Obviously both genders do not like infidelity of any sort from their partner. The primary point is which type of infidelity the genders (on average) dislike the most and, like I said prior, men fear sexual infidelity more than emotional infidelity while the inverse is true for women and this has been confirmed across cultures.

  6. Hey Andrew,

    I completely agree. I remember regarding the class I took called "Sex, Power, and Conflict." This relates to the Evolutionary Psychology of human beings. Men have social cues to being attracted to the most reproductive mate while females pursue those beings that can provide them with a stable life.

    I obviously think that is intriguing and we can talk about this for hours. The best thing about this post was that each person's opinion is valid, and that conflicting ideas make for a nice debate!

    Anyways, enjoyed reading everyone's post and comment to this.